The Reason Why Target is the Bermuda Triangle of Retail

targetScene:

You walk into Target to get some detergent, toothpaste, and socks.

You walk out of Target with some lip balm, a $5 DVD, two packs of gum, a broom, body wash, a scarf, kitchen towels, car freshener, a water filter, and cookies.

As you walk out of the store, you realize it’s been two hours. By the time you get home, you realize that you bought nothing that was on your list of items to purchase in the first place.

Dammit, Gina!

What is it about Target? Why is it a black whole of nothingness (like the Bermuda Triangle), but everything-ness at the same time?

I think I have the answer: it’s in the air. They pump something through the vents that makes us lose all common sense and wander around the store, in search of things we don’t need. I think they put extra amounts of this mysterious substance into the popcorn. That’s why it’s in the front of the store. It’s a trap! A trap, I say! We get lured in by the scent of the popcorn (even if we don’t buy any) and by the time we walk past the food area, we have breathed in enough to get us in the aisles and spend all of our money.

I ain’t tellin’ no lie and you know it!

Other places that have this mysterious substance pumped into the air are:

Starbucks. I mean, how else can you explain spending $5 for some coffee. COFFEE! Add a pastry to that, and boom! $10 gone. On coffee and bread. Just like that. Instead of popcorn though, they get you with the music.

The Dollar Store. Listen. I can spend all kinds of time in the dollar store; particularly, the Dollar Tree. Something happens to my brain that makes me think about how much of a steal everything is, for just a dollar! I can’t resist. Then before I know it, I’m walking out the store with twenty trinkets that will likely disappear into thin air overnight.  Their trap? Shopping carts. Think about it…why would anyone really need a shopping cart in the dollar store?

The movie theater. Need I say more? You already know what the trap is here. Yep, you guessed it…the popcorn. It’s a different kind of popcorn than the one at Target, though. This is industrial strength. It has to be, because at $14 per person for admission? We must be on crack to go the movies! And THEN they want you to spend $5 on a box of stale candy you could have bought from the dollar store. See how they work together?

Straight conspiracies!

What stores would you add to the list?

7 comments


  • everytime i go to target, i actually get what i went in there for tho. I think you may just have a problem sugar lol. I do get extra stuff when im in there most times tho but i always get what i went in there for. lol

    February 27, 2013
    • Amber

      No ma’am! This is real life and I know I’m not alone! LOL

      February 27, 2013
  • Yes, Amber, yes. Target is a conspiracy. I HATE shopping and there is not one store in this world that I actually enjoy walking through…EXCEPT TARGET.

    Their house ware/dinner ware section is always a treat though I never buy anything (except the few times I’ve found clearance items).

    And the baby/girl’s section always pulls me in, too. I admit I may buy something from that section on every trip. And I go to Target at least a couple of times a week.

    Let’s not even TALK about the popcorn, which I had for dinner last night. Not even kidding.

    Yes, Target is the devil (hence the red). And I’ve been sleeping with the devil…

    February 27, 2013
  • Target, oh how I love thee!!! It’s rare that I spend less than 50 dollars there. Last trip alone was 200!!!! Something in the air, indeed.

    February 27, 2013
  • Ajah

    Target…oh, how I love thee! I am notorious for spending hours walking around with a cart full of things I do not need. Not to mention, doing so while snacking on popcorn and a slurpee. Sometimes, I think I should own stock in the company since I am there so much.

    February 28, 2013
  • Target is a little slice of paradise! I always get what I go in for plus extra. It’s great for midday or late night solo mommy time trips.

    March 4, 2013
  • Oh how I love and hate Target. Totally blows my budget every month and I always “forget” one item but remember extras! I swear I go at least twice a week. It’s terrible. But they have EVERYTHING! Diapers, aromatherapy candles, a bathing suit AND a suitcase? I mean…..

    March 5, 2013

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